The State of The Hellmouth Address! (For August 2004!)

Ah, it's that time again, kiddies. HMC's "State of the Hellmouth" address. I haven't done this in...well, it seems like it's been a long time. Anywho, let's get right to it.

What's on Tap?

- HHC

It's in Norcross, GA - November 4-7. Tickets are on sale now.

There will be unique panels. There will be parties. There will be games. Do show up. Eric, Jon and I will be there, so you just KNOW it's going to be crazy.

- More of everything you've come to expect for HMC.

More rants, more poobah, more articles from Aeryn, Tiffany (i promise, I know you miss her Wink), Vibes (I think), Brit, Seven (I think), and everyone else.

More features. The next "Comics on the Edge" is coming. Not to mention more new specials - including "The Worst Moments in Buffy History", brought to you The Poob and Prez.

The Numbers

- 1069 members on the board.
- Over 382,000 board posts.

- An estimated 1.2 million unique visits on the homepage alone since we opened.
- Over 2,200 visits per day on the homepage.

- The largest day ever was April 21, 2004. Over 4,700 visits.

And now the talk....

Hellhounds, as we've entered our 29 month online, I can only hope there will be more to come. I can only hope we expand and grow, even when there are no Jossverse shows on the air. My only promise to you can be that we will be around for at least another year. I'm hoping that it's longer -- personally I think it will be.

The only way to ensure this is to continue to click on our sponsors, or buy merchandise from our emporium. This isn't some Buffyguide talk, don't think I'm a walking advertisement. I'm just stating the obvious here, I guess.

Board Etiquette

I would like to dissect a few things for you about the board and the way we try to keep this place the way it was designed to be.

1. When Mods tell you to stop something or say you're breaking a rule, it is not a personal problem with you. They are just doing their jobs. Anyone with an "overthrow the mods" urgency will be promptly booted out the door.

2. Anything having to do with our President or Mr. Kerry is not tolerated. It will be deleted on sight, without even a needed response. Same goes for anything having to do with war or politics in any way. There's no exception to this rule.

3. If you see something funny but graphic on the homepage, that doesn't mean it can be used as a defense for saying whatever you want on the board. There's a difference here. The board is made for friendly banter, conversation, debate and feedback. It is not made for...

"Killing people", "S&M", or anything that would be taken as NC-17. In other words, if it was in "Showgirls", it shouldn't be said. Not only because it was NC-17, but also because it really, really sucked.

4. It's fun to play "hide in the closet", "kissy face" or "lap time" with someone, unless you don't really know them or they don't really want to do it in the first place. This is mostly a response to recent newbie problems. If you don't know 'em well enough to know whether or not they'd like the cutesy stuff from you, then you probably shouldn't try it in the first place.

- A poster that used to be on the board by the name of Hounds used to be into telling people how depressed he was, and when folks tried to help him he'd say "You're no help" and then he'd talk about it again. This went on for what seemed to be 6 months, until about 25 people came to me at the same time to tell me that this had to be for attention. Why? Because if 25 people try to help you, and all you really want to do is complain and not fix it, then you aren't really depressed, you just have too much time on your hands. If I get any complaints over attention-getters, people who start fights just for the sake of starting something, or go barking at a good person who's trying to help them, there will be reprecussions. I am tired of having to walk on egg shells because of drama queens. Believe me I don't mind the PMs, I love them....but I get way too many negative ones for my liking.

"But he seems nice sometimes". "But you have to understand her situation". This isn't anything personal for me. I get complaints on a daily basis, and I would rather have 50 people who are happy, then 50 who are miserable due to one, two, or three people.

So from here on out, the 3 strikes rule does not stand any longer. I'm going to give ONE warning, and the 2nd time will be the last. Please understand this. You WILL BE BOOTED THE 2ND TIME. I am now keeping permanent records.

Your names will be on it only if you have a warning. The warning goes away after 6 months, and you'll be back off the list. And yes, the rules page hasn't been changed to reflect this yet, but it will. And this, as of today, is in effect.

So there's your board etiquette, and your additional information. This isn't for one person, but everyone to know. I'm dead serious. Maybe too serious, so here to calm you down is...

a parrot with a hat on...

[image]

There. Feel better? Yeah, me too.

Anyway, here's to another year at HMC. I hope you all understand how much I love this place. And we're going to keep it going for as long as we possibly can. Join us, or simply stay with us. Smile

Your SITE....uh...janitor?,
Matt